Hiya. If
you saw the link I posted yesterday on facebook, you’ll know I take cheating in a
relationship very seriously-I fear it’s growing in numbers, probably the
leading factor in divorce. Many people
think it’s only the physical act-especially, the cheater, it’s their way of
relieving any guilt-but it’s so much more, it’s way deeper than that.
The
article explains there are five other types: emotional, energetic, mental,
spiritual, and visual. To be honest,
some of these sound similar to me, but all of them could lead a person to
physically cheat on their partner. They
all are very harmful because, most importantly, but not limited to, they
destroy trust.
Some
examples of these types of adultery are when your partner (often) communicates
with a third person about more intimate things than what they tell you, or your
partner telling third person they’d be happy imagining them naked-perhaps
posing, or dancing, or just standing still.
It’s fantasizing; now, the article makes a clear distinction between
saying, “Oh, he/she is hot,” and going about your day, and, “Ooh, he/she is
HOT!” and pursuing it further. It is
visiting pornographic websites. It is
lying to your partner about where you are, or leaving out parts of the story
when the part left out is sexual. It is
going against God (or your religious belief).
It is
a million different but unclean things that they are not physically doing.
Sometimes,
the guilty one, if thinking they are caught, will engage in two opposite
behaviors. 1. Be extra lovey-dovey to
the partner until suspicion dies down, or 2. my favorite (sarcastic laugh) ignoring
or treating partner like shit, making them feel as if they are wrong somehow,
or stupid, or something, just to justify what they are doing is okay. I’ve seen these-I personally know these
people-and they are disgusting!
Maybe
the cheater really does love you. But
guess what-they don’t love you enough.
They want to have their cake and eat it, too. As a kid, I never understood that line, but
now, I do. If somebody doesn’t love you
enough to only need to be with you, I’m sorry-I’m not trying to sound pessimistic-chances
are, you won’t win. Leave before
everything that makes you You is smashed to Hell.
If
you are the adulterer, physical or other, just be honest, for once, and leave
the much more deserving partner to find who Really Loves them. Maybe you were the one being cheated on
once. I’m truly sorry. But why would you want your new partner to go
through the torture you suffered? Maybe
you like being a jerk. Either way, the
faithful, unconditional partner never deserved to be lonely.
Just my opinion.
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